Live & Learn Archive

The Death of Robin Williams, Why I Talk About Depression And What Comes Next

Since Robin Williams died on Monday I have written and scrapped three separate pieces inspired by his death. None of them quite felt right. Everything felt a bit forced. Here’s

The topic of consent has been weighing heavy on my mind this last week. I’ve watched people wrestle with it, spring into action around it, snark about it, debate it,

A topic of great importance to me is depression and the impact it has on sexuality. I’ve been doing a ton of research lately (I’m working on something… we’ll talk

A large heart made out of sex toys on a wooden floor

I’ve had a bunch of milestones to celebrate lately. Last night was the one-year anniversary of Sex Geekdom Portland, the recent launch of the Portland Academy of Sex Education was

I’ve been shell-shocked in the wake of the UCSB shootings. The violence was horrific, yes, but I’ve found myself horrified as much by the internet response as by the shootings

It’s Masturbation May, a time to celebrate the wonder that is self-love. It has come to my attention that there are some fairly common practices can make masturbation not-so-fun so I

I’ve been having a hard time writing these last couple of weeks. New insurance led to a switch in which particular generic form of my antidepressant I received and lo

If you are still, now, days later, trying to avoid finding out how the How I Met Your Mother finale went down, don’t read this. You’ve been warned. On Monday

So, you may have noticed I haven’t been around the social media world much the last couple days. If you’ve been looking closely you may have noticed that the only

One of the best moments of my sex geek career happened a couple of weeks back on a Friday night. Now, a lot happened that night. I taught at the

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JoEllen Notte is a writer, speaker, and mental health advocate whose work explores the impact of depression on sex and relationships. Since 2012 she has written about sex, mental health, and how none of us are broken here at The Redhead Bedhead.

JoEllen has led workshops nationwide on sexual communication, navigating consent, having casual sex kindly, and dating as an introvert. She has toured sex shops, spoken at length on dildos, and even started a sex school but she is happiest and most effective when writing and speaking on behalf of quiet people who have sex. Check out her video series on attending conferences as an introvert and her extensive writing on sex and depression.

JoEllen has spoken at Clark College, University of Chicago, University of Tennessee, the Guelph Sexuality Conference, Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit, and the Playground Conference

JoEllen’s first book The Monster Under the Bed: Sex, Depression & The Conversation We Aren’t Having was published by Thorntree Press in March 2020. Her new book In It Together: Navigating Depression with Partners, Friends, and Family was published by Thornapple Press in March 2023.

Live & Learn Archive

The Death of Robin Williams, Why I Talk About Depression And What Comes Next

F*ck Yeah! Talking About Consent

Talking About Sex & Depression

2 Years of Bedhead: Pictures, Thank Yous and Mushy Stuff

22 Things I’ve Thought About in the Days Since the UCSB Shootings

You’re Doing It Wrong!!! 4 Ways to Mess Up Masturbation

5 Ways to Stay Sex Positive When You’re Dealing With Depression

The How I Met Your Mother Finale Forgot the Rules About “The One”

Lobbing Love Bombs from a Safe Distance

Not Knowing is Half the Battle