Live & Learn Archive

All The Times I Should Have Left My Terrible Therapist

For four years, 2007-2011, I saw a therapist mostly weekly with some periods of monthly visits when she thought I was “doing better”. Something that became very clear to me

When the urge hit me to write a “I bet you don’t know this about JoEllen!” post, I’ll admit I figured it would just be fun, frothy, and easy. For

I sat down to write my annual “best of” post and I was confronted with the fact that, compared to other years, I really didn’t write a whole lot in

In the past my annual favorite things list was always a list of products, frequently featuring links to my reviews of said products. This year I tested and reviewed significantly

Sometimes, we have patterns in relationships that we don’t really understand, or even see. I’ve long known that I find asking people for anything terrifying so I shy away from doing

Silver Doxy Die Cast wand, JoEllen's name badge, and a bag from Woodhull's Sexual Freedom Summit

It’s been a month since I left for Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit and I still miss being there! I sat down to write this thinking I would give you the

CW: Suicide, Suicidal thoughts “When I chose to live, there was no joy it’s just a line I crossed” -Dar Williams After All You hear a lot of stories

I spent this past weekend at BinderCon surrounded by writers, pitching my book to agents (who responded favorably, btw), and receiving support from some of my favorite colleagues and friends,

Earlier this week I read a Washington Post article about by a woman whose relationship was torn apart while she and her partner tried to deal with his depression. Reading

So this year I didn’t make any new year’s resolutions, instead I had a revelation. It came to me slowly over the week leading up to Christmas and hit hard

«‹2 345 6 ›»

JoEllen Notte is a writer, speaker, and mental health advocate whose work explores the impact of depression on sex and relationships. Since 2012 she has written about sex, mental health, and how none of us are broken here at The Redhead Bedhead.

JoEllen has led workshops nationwide on sexual communication, navigating consent, having casual sex kindly, and dating as an introvert. She has toured sex shops, spoken at length on dildos, and even started a sex school but she is happiest and most effective when writing and speaking on behalf of quiet people who have sex. Check out her video series on attending conferences as an introvert and her extensive writing on sex and depression.

JoEllen has spoken at Clark College, University of Chicago, University of Tennessee, the Guelph Sexuality Conference, Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit, and the Playground Conference

JoEllen’s first book The Monster Under the Bed: Sex, Depression & The Conversation We Aren’t Having was published by Thorntree Press in March 2020. Her new book In It Together: Navigating Depression with Partners, Friends, and Family was published by Thornapple Press in March 2023.

Live & Learn Archive

All The Times I Should Have Left My Terrible Therapist

20 Things You Might Not Know About JoEllen

2016 Best of Bedhead: Posts, Podcasts, Appearances & More!

JoEllen’s 2016 Favorite Things!

What Apartment Hunting Taught Me About Relationships

When I Chose To Live – I Spent 3 Days Suicidal

Surviving A Bully (When You’re 35)

5 Steps To Take When Your Partner Is Dealing With Depression

My New Year’s Revelation