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The Redhead Bedhead: Sex Educator JoEllen Notte
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12 November 2013

Talking About Sex & Depression with Kinkly.com

Not actually me. I have a stand-in for the pensive moments.

Not actually me. I have a stand-in for the intense moments.

This week over on Kinkly.com I’m talking about a subject very near to my heart- depression. It is a condition that, according to the CDC affects 1 in 10 adults in the US and yet we still don’t really talk all that openly about it. For this reason, folks often don’t really understand the what the depression experience entails or recognize depression in the various ways it crops up. A prime example of this is in the bedroom. Depression can have a huge impact on libido and when anti-depressants enter the picture they can cause the body to stop responding sexually – to the untrained eye it looks like your partner has just lost interest and that can be stressful for both parties. So, my latest piece It’s Not You: 4 Signs Your Partner’s Too Depressed to Have Sex aims to give folks  some understanding of depressed partners are dealing with and get us talking about this important issue. Check it out!

It’s Not You: 4 Signs Your Partner’s Too Depressed to Have Sex

A couple of weeks ago, someone tweeted at me to ask for advice on getting their partner “to be more into sex.” It turned out that said partner was dealing with depression and had lost all sexual interest. I tried to explain to this man that he really couldn’t do much to make his partner want sex at the moment, that it sounded like the depression was causing the loss of libido. So, I told him that treating the depression would be the best route to treating the libido issue. I got the distinct impression this answer was not satisfactory and was left with a tweet about how a romantic bath would be set up. I felt a knot form in my stomach. I could tell he didn’t quite understand what I was saying – and I wasn’t going to get through to him in less than 140 characters…

Check out the rest at Kinkly.com!


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1 Comment

  1. dizzygirl Reply
    November 12, 2014 at 11:32 am

    I went through a period where sex seemed alien to me and I just didn’t get what all the fuss was about. I actually started to feel angry about it when I’d see it in movies and stuff because my libido had just up and left the building. It had nothing to do with my husband. We’ve always been good together. It was just me, the depression and the meds.

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  • Sex & Depression
    • JoEllen’s Writing
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    • Resources
  • Superhero Sex Shops
    • The Map – Find a Shop
    • The Write-Ups -What’s Up at the Shops
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    • Best Of Bedhead
    • Being Cool With The Sex
    • Body Basics & Beyond
    • Geeking out
    • Gettin’ Riled Up
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    • Reviews
  • Online Learning
    • The Business of Blogging About Sex
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