So you know when you’re about to embark on a totally new, totally foreign experience and you are having a hard time figuring out what it will even look like for you? That feeling that everyone else already knows what they are doing and is so much cooler than you are? Does anyone else get this feeling? I can’t be the only one. I’m going to come right out and say it- if you are about to enter the world of non-monogamy and dealing with that feeling I just talked about – My Life on the Swingset is the book for you.

To be clear, this isn’t an instructional “how to be nonmonogamous” book, Cooper doesn’t claim to have all the answers. What he does instead is tell you his story (or, more accurately, “stories” as this is a collection of essays) in a way that makes you feel like you’re listening to a good friend who has been there and is willing to let you know how stuff went for them.

I think my favorite thing about this book is that it’s not here to tell you why nonmonogamy is the greatest and how Cooper has the sexiest life ever. There’s no judgement of other lifestyles here (I was reminded of the time I attended one of Cooper’s parties with a monogamously married friend and she later told Coop that he had thrown a “sex party where monogamous people could feel comfortable.”), there’s no sensationalism, just honesty about the experience, which is something I think a lot of people looking to enter the world of nonmonogamy really need to hear because it’s not always fun and hot and sexy. Sometimes it’s scary, sometimes it’s lonely, sometimes it’s awkward as all hell and Cooper doesn’t shy away from sharing that.

For me it feels like My Life on the Swingset fills a void that in the nonmonogamy required reading list. Because, let’s be honest, there’s a little library folks run out and get when they want to explore nonmonogamy (don’t deny it folks, you know it’s a thing!) and reading My Life on the Swingset I realized it was the piece I never knew was missing. There are several books full of instructions, tips and advice (And you should definitely read those too, seriously. Do it.) but Cooper makes you feel like you have found a friend who has tried all the stuff you’re curious about and will be really honest with you about it. This book is a glimpse at what it looks like when someone you can relate to actually puts those how-to books into action, answering the question “But what does this look like when folks like me try it?” If you are thinking about opening up, being ethically slutty, engaging in some sex at dawn or having a relationship of more than two, you definitely want My Life on the Swingset in your library.

Clearly, I love My Life on the Swingset–  I added it to the Bedhead Approved Reading page ages ago! (I may be behind on reviews) I think a lot of you will love it too. Get yours here: Bookshop.org

Thank you to Cooper Beckett for sending me a copy of My Life on the Swingset to review!

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