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The Redhead Bedhead: Sex Educator JoEllen Notte
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Self Serve, a Superhero Sex Shop, Needs Our Help!

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Self Serve’s owner, Matie Fricker

In Albuquerque NM there is a magical place called Self Serve Sexuality Resource Center. It’s a sex shop, it’s a meting place, it’s an education center -it’s amazing (as is owner Matie Fricker)! The wonderful Ashley Manta wrote about it a while back as part of the Superhero Sex Shop Tour.

Well, over the last year Self Serve has been the victim of repeated acts of vandalism that have cause thousands of dollars of damage to this fabulous sex positive resource. Check out the local news coverage:

Self Serve is raising money so they can take some measures to protect their shop from vandalism and continue with their wonderful work and they could use your help. They are offering some very cool incentives and every dollar helps. Seriously folks, for a small business like this dealing with unexpected expenses can be devastated and Self Serve is so desperately needed – take a look at this map, there is nothing like it around for miles- states even. So, go help them out! You can donate here.

Please share the campaign as well – twitter, facebook, tumblr, whatever new cool thing the kids are using- just get it out there! Good sex shops matter, so let’s love the ones we’ve got! Donate to Self Serve!

Love you, Self Serve!

Love you, Self Serve!


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About JoEllen

JoEllen Notte is a writer, speaker, and mental health advocate whose work explores the impact of depression on sex and relationships. Since 2012 she has written about sex, mental health, and how none of us are broken here at The Redhead Bedhead.

JoEllen has led workshops nationwide on sexual communication, navigating consent, having casual sex kindly, and dating as an introvert. She has toured sex shops, spoken at length on dildos, and even started a sex school but she is happiest and most effective when writing and speaking on behalf of quiet people who have sex. Check out her video series on attending conferences as an introvert and her extensive writing on sex and depression.

JoEllen has spoken at Clark College, University of Chicago, University of Tennessee, the Guelph Sexuality Conference, Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit, and the Playground Conference

JoEllen’s first book The Monster Under the Bed: Sex, Depression & The Conversation We Aren’t Having was published by Thorntree Press in March 2020. Her new book In It Together: Navigating Depression with Partners, Friends, and Family was published by Thornapple Press in March 2023.

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  • Sex & Depression
    • JoEllen’s Writing
    • Podcasts & Radio
    • Writing Tips
    • In The Media
    • Resources
  • Superhero Sex Shops
    • The Map – Find a Shop
    • The Write-Ups -What’s Up at the Shops
  • Blog
    • Best Of Bedhead
    • Being Cool With The Sex
    • Body Basics & Beyond
    • Geeking out
    • Gettin’ Riled Up
    • Live & Learn
    • Toys for Grown Ups
    • Reviews
  • Online Learning
    • The Business of Blogging About Sex
    • Will Work For Sponsorship Online Class, Tools, & Coaching
    • Conferences As An Introvert
    • Resources
  • Shopping
    • Recommended Reading
    • Get JoEllen’s Favorite Stuff!
  • Press | Media
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